American Dating Customs.

Banana Splitsville.

Oh, the slapstick humor! The irony! Like I’ve always said, there’s nothing better than desecrating a cemetery with banana peels and broken robot parts.

Reincarnation.

I suppose one of the worst things to get reincarnated as is a food product. You spoil pretty easily, but in retrospect, if you’re a fast food product, there’s enough artificial preservatives to keep you going for a long time.

A Conversation with Death.

Who knew there’d be so many synonyms and aliases for The Grim Reaper?

Despite Death’s appearance here, I should note that he/she should not have a specific gender but merely exist as an androgynous entity. ZCC’s just, well, a pervert.

And the Amish are scary… Am I afraid to say that? No, BECAUSE THEY DON’T USE THE INTERNET! BWAHAHA!

Happy Mom’s Weekend.

Mom’s Weekend is the time where mothers drive down to U of I and (in most cases) get drunk with their children. If I had a video camera, I bet I can convince some maternal units to take off their tops… as they probably sing Neil Diamond songs.

You should see the uncensored version of Drunk Mom’s chest…

Squirrels are Mucho Evil.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: squirrels are evil… Seriously, one time, I had a stare-down face-off with a squirrel.

Bran Muffins.

Fact or Fiction? Beyond Belief!

I Dunno.

Jimmy’s Influence.